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  • Liz Kahn, MA, MBC

Spacing Out into the Yuck



It happens to everyone. You know, that space between activities that require concentration, when the little (or big) irritations start to bubble up. Maybe you’re vacuuming, for me it’s when I’m doing the dishes, that conversation with the person who is currently pissing you off is playing out, and you are ON POINT with responses, aren’t you? Well, I always am.

In these moments, the moments that are “mindless”, we are powerful, quick witted, confident and strong. We don’t let that person push us around, speak to us that way, judge us so harshly - we tell them exactly what they can do with all that ugliness...in our minds.

We justify and rationalize our own behavior there, too. We imagine we’ve been caught in the thing that we are hiding and how we would reply. Like when you’re driving - speeding - and you imagine what you might say to the police officer who might pull you over….

When we are in our heads, without a sounding board to bounce things off of, we can begin to firmly believe that what we are thinking is real! That it is totally ok to speed if you have a good enough reason; that you are stronger than you were in the face of that confrontation; that you are, in fact, ok.

But we aren’t. And the fact that those thoughts keep assaulting us when we are doing something safe and familiar, tells us that there is something else going on that no amount of inner dialog is going to solve.

Try this instead:

When you catch yourself in the stream of thought, as soon as you realize that you are doing it (because these things are so natural that often we don’t even realize it until someone “wakes” us up!), try

to do the following things:

  1. INTERRUPT yourself. Yes, this sounds so simple, but seriously, try it before you slam it.

  2. ASK yourself: What is this scenario trying to tell me? What do I need to know about this that will help me make it better?

  3. FOCUS on those questions for a SOLID 60 seconds (you’ll learn over time why I recommend only 60-seconds)

  4. SHIFT your physical body out of the position it was in during the thought stream. Stretch your arms, wiggle your body, do a few squats...anything to break the chemical loop that is happening in your body when your thoughts run rampant… a post for another day.

When you take the reigns on your thought process, you ignite a different process - one that is surprisingly healing, and works amazingly fast. Try doing this at least 5 times everyday for the next 5 days and see if you don’t notice remarkable changes in how you feel.

Here’s a little chart to keep you organized! So simple to recreate in a way that makes you happy, just make 5 marks on each day and cross out or fill in that mark each time you do this exercise! You've GOT this!

Sunday: 1 2 3 4 5

Monday: 1 2 3 4 5

Tuesday: 1 2 3 4 5

Wednesday: 1 2 3 4 5

Thursday: 1 2 3 4 5

Friday: 1 2 3 4 5

Saturday: 1 2 3 4 5

For more information, you can always contact me at Liz@DitchTheDx.com


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